Crash course women’s arousal and pleasure

Author: taliaamour
May 30, 2019

women’s #arousal and #pleasure 
One of the greatest challenges in #relationships is

unskilled/uneducated/unaware lovers and #communication breakdown.

It is no surprise these can be major issues. Many of us had a lack of accurate sexual health information available growing up and even as adults. There is little to no research done on women’s sexual pleasure and pain. (please donate to vulvalove.org) No one ever teaches us communication skills, let alone communication skills about sexual needs and desires. 

Many women often say no sex is better than bad sex! Especially if they are having trouble experiencing orgasm with a partner, if they have asked for what they want and are not getting it or simply don’t know what to ask for or how to ask.

Here are a few tips and recommendations for creating a more satisfying experience for yourself and your partner.

Have a consent or exploration conversation before you dive into any sexual experience. (especially with a new partner)

Make sure that she feels comfortable to communicate with you- *hot tip: Frame the conversation- Say out loud- there are no judgment or expectations and nothing will be taken personally, this is all just information…and mean it!

Many women are willing to try different things as long as they feel safe and not ashamed or judged by/with their partner, trust is of utmost importance! 

Guys: Don’t act out the porn you just saw unless you have had a discussion about it first. Porn is not real life. Porn is not sex education, porn is entertainment – you don’t see the before, in between and after care – it is only the hi lites for your entertainment. Porn can be used in a healthy way. However be conscious: when it has become your main source of turn on, only way you learned about sex and or viewed compulsively it can greatly disturb arousal, strength of erection/erection consistency, sexual response and relationships with other people.

Idea- Perhaps you could watch porn together then talk about the way it makes you feel and discuss whether or not it’s something that you would like to try together.

Remember- in the heat of the moment yes’ can become no’s but no’s can not become yes’. 

  (Side note: Even with an escort it is best to find out what they are comfortable with when you start the date (not via email, many companions will don’t discuss specifics via email for safety reasons) Just because you are making a donation for their TIME doesn’t give you permission to treat them in a way that they feel is disrespectful or unpleasurable to them.)

*hot tip: how to start a conversation ? You could say 

I’m really into XYZ are you comfortable with that?’ 

‘I recently saw this type of play and I am interested in experimenting. 

How do you feel/what do you think about that? 

 Would you like to try it with me?’ 

Tell me if I am using too much or too little pressure…

Does xyz feel good to you? 

Would you like more pressure than this or less?

What are your boundaries as far as kink?

What do you find pleasurable? 

What is not pleasurable to you? 

A little bit of communication even if it feels awkward, can guarantee a more satisfying experience for you both. Keep in mind the more you have these conversations the more comfortable they will become.

Please do not be offended if your partner has not had an orgasm with you or their whole life.

Most women take orgasm to make the man feel better about himself/not to hurt his feelings. (Some men’s self esteem and ego is greatly intertwined in their sexual prowess. This is a harmful message men receive growing up that I believe needs to be dispelled as it is harmful to men and women alike) 

If a woman has never orgasmed remind them they deserve sexual pleasure and you are honored to help them experience that- at their own pace. 

*possibility: There may be a misconception of what an orgasm is. Keep in mind: what you see in porn is not always how a woman expresses orgasm. (I know I have had silent orgasms, laughing orgasms, intense loud orgasms, shaking orgasms). There is a full spectrum of orgasmic energy and it comes out in many different ways. Don’t limit her. Just because it doesn’t look like you think it should, does not mean that she did not experience orgasm. Porn is exaggerated and dramatic for your entertainment, it’s just like any movie where emotions and actions are dramatize in order to get the point across. 

*recommendation: video-becoming orgasmic. 

It can be helpful to see how other women look during an orgasm that is not staged. Some women feel like they look ugly or weird when they have that big O. 

Give her more time to become aroused before direct genital contact. 

Encourage self pleasure and to go longer with self pleasure.

Did you know: most women take anywhere from 20-40 min to become fully aroused. 

Challenges experiencing orgasm may result from having a conservative family upbringing. There may be shame and guilt around sexuality. Maybe there was no privacy to even explore themselves. They may even have old patterns of orgasm and masrurbation that are challenging to integrate into partner sex….have no judgments and do not shame them. 

Did you know: 80 to 90 %of women need clitoral stimulation to reach orgasm. 3 out of 4 women do not reach orgasm from penetrative sex alone. 

New techniques may need to be learned. 

*book recommendation: She Comes First

Sexalogical body work is an option depending on where you live and the laws. 

Betty Dodson is a great resource for women to become comfortable with/get to know their bodies and orgasm.

Trusting their partner is a large part of experiencing orgasm as well. Trust is built by little things through the day and overtime. Doing what you say you will (having integrity with your words and actions) about little things helps to build trust. Call when you say you will, ask her about something she thought was important she shared with you. Being on time. I know it sounds silly but if you have integrity with little things it shows you will have integrity with big things. That creates trust.

It takes courage to be vulnerable and release control. Learning to/allow yourself to let go and relax and experience is a huge deal! Again this comes from discussing boundaries and respecting/sticking to them. 

One mee hot tip for you- 

remove the pressure/expectations around having an orgasm or an ejaculation! Come into the moment and enjoy the connection. Fall in love with the journey along the way unattached to an end result. That is when magic happens. 

Travel dates 

Pittsburgh may 25-June 1

Tampa June 2-9

Atlanta June 10-14

Tampa June 14- sept 3

Sept 4 is my birthday I will be going to Costa Rica for a Coaching Workshop. I would be very grateful for any gifts/donations to contribute towards this training. The dates are sept 5-13 so I leave on my birthday and get home on sept 14. 

Donations to my education can be sent to holisticprogressions@yahoo.com via P.P send money to a friend. I also have venmo you can message me for that info. Thank you in advance for your generosity and support on my mission to dispel the false belief that masculine energy is toxic. It is time to bring the Divine back to masculine! When we bring the Conscious Divine masculine we also bring Conscious Divine feminine. When we heal one we heal the other two halves make us whole.

Website link
Twitter @talia_amour

Email taliaamour@protonmail.com

img 5334 Crash course womens arousal and pleasure img 5307 Crash course womens arousal and pleasureimg 5335 Crash course womens arousal and pleasure


Pleasure Potential, you are a work of Art

Author: taliaamour
April 1, 2018

Pleasure potential, you are a work of art

By talia amour

In business we always talk about somebody’s potential… Potential for leadership, sales potential, potential to rise within the company, Financial potential and on and on. Potential being defined as future possibility, possibility to develop, latent qualities or abilities.

They say anything great takes effort. Achieving potential takes effort. Sand has the potential to become glass, a piece of glass has potential to become a beautiful work of art. Without time and effort the sand will never become glass nor will the glass become a beautiful work of art. It takes imagination time and effort to achieve something amazing. It takes hope or faith that the vision is possible. 

Have you ever considered what your sexual potential is? or your potential to experience pleasure?

Think about where you were when you first started to have sexual experiences as compared to where you are today. I imagine that with experience and time, you know more now than you did then. The question is: has the experience and knowledge that you have now facilitated your Optimum potential for pleasure?

There really isn’t that many places to receive accurate sexual technique and health information. Through the internet we definitely have more resources but there is so much information out there. 

Our experiences also helped to shape our ideas values and beliefs around sexuality and sexual pleasure. We can even get misinformation and develop false beliefs about ourselves or others along the way due to past experiences. How do we know what the greater truth is for us personally?

First make sure that you have accurate sexual health education. Learning sexual anatomy and physiology is an important part of experiencing your greatest sexual potential. Understanding the phases of human growth and development, as well as aging, gives us a better perspective on our sexual potential for where we’re at.

Keep in mind that when you read or hear about sexual Peaks or Primes what is being referred to is your optimum reproductive phase of your life, not your potential for sexual pleasure.

Having a strong sense of your values and beliefs around sexuality gives you a wonderful starting point to explore your sexual pleasure potential.

It’s interesting how our ideas values and beliefs tend to change over time. The more we learn the more accepting and curious we become.

Sexuality includes your mind, emotions, Body, Energy and spirit. 

what do you need to know or learn so you can experience greater pleasure? 

what emotion or past experiences needs to be healed so you can embrace and accept yourself?

how can you connect with and get to know, your body more to experience intense sensation?

how much energy are you willing to invest into discovering your sexual and pleasure potential?

what beliefs are holding you back from your optimal sexual self?

While our sexuality so individual and personal it is also deeply intertwined with other people. We often don’t achieve amazing things on our own. It’s a collective effort it takes multiple pieces of sand to become glass. Once the glass is a beautiful work of art it takes someone to appreciate the work and witness it. 

Journal about your ideal sexual self, really visualize every detail. What does your ideal sexual self look like? What Behavior patterns do you follow? How do you feel? Who are you with? Where are you physically? What does it smell like? What do you need to let go of in order to experience something greater? What do you need to learn? Get detailed. Write it as if it is in the present; then take steps in order to achieve this vision. 

Allow yourself to Hope fantasize and dream. After all, where the Mind goes the body will follow.

img 0171 Pleasure Potential, you are a work of Art


Sex toys for all, enhancing your pleasure!

Author: taliaamour
January 1, 2018

Sex Toys for all!!! Enhancing your pleasure! 

By Talia 

http://taliaamour.cuties-sites.com/home

​ Here is a little crash course in sex toys, I share some experience and recommendations 

Some people have preconceived negative ideas around using sex toys and/or lubricants. As sex coach’s, we can educate our client and hopefully reframe or transform some of those negative associations they have with sex toys and lubricant usage.

Lubricants are either silicone based or water based. Silicone lubricant are great for any kind of anal play. Water-based lubricants can be used for vaginal moisture. It’s good to stay away from glycerin products as they could cause yeast infection. Always remember oil is not compatible with condom usage it’s best to go with a water-based or silicone lube when using condoms. I like the pjur brand of lubs they have water based and silicone for a variety of specialty uses. Be careful with desensitizing lubricant you still want to be able to feel what’s going on so you don’t hurt yourself another option is to use a lubricant with herbs/ingredients that have relaxing or stimulating property is not necessarily a numbing.

Sex toys for solo use can be a great way to experiment privately with your own sexual pleasure and orgasmic cycle.

Couples can also enjoy sex ways to spice up their love life and to help build on their already established trust and connection. Nuru gel is a water/seaweed base gel you can use to massage and slid around in, it’s great for couples play!

I’ve had the pleasure and the blessing to connect with someone that I’ve been able to explore a variety of experiences with over the last five years. I think we’ve purchased and broken almost every single sex toy presented in the video and that I found online.

For guys interested and prostate play: they have everything from prostate massager that are classified as medical devices to vibrating prostate massagers that are more marketed towards pleasure/entertainment. I still like the ability to use my fingers covered with a glove or condoms because I can actually feel the prostate. when I use a strap-on dildos I feel like I have less control.

For guys wanting to maintain an erection longer cock rings are great if you want to take it to the next level you can even put one around his balls too. Just make sure to get the right size (I’ve seen one get stuck on guy before and his cock turned all blue and purple, we had to wait to get it off and it was a bit concerning.)

They have a variety of male masturbation sleeves that are pretty cool too. Everything from the fleshlight to the Tanga eggs.

for women: I personally always enjoy the clitoral stimulators specifically the oscillating ones. G Spot toys are great too, they can help with squirting. The smoother longer dildos are great for a deep internal vaginal orgasm.

I tend to like the toys that are operated by batteries because it gives you a variety of sensation as the batteries are new and then they start to die so your body doesn’t get used to the only settings on there.

We went through a phase and experimented with different suction toys. Again be careful, I have bruised my nipple/boob from getting a bit carried away… then we went through a phase with all different size dildos…again don’t overestimate yourself! you can actually hurt yourself choose shapes and sizes that are realistic and compatible for your body! And if you really want to fit that huge monster cock anywhere inside of you go slow loosen it up and use a lot of lubricant, don’t stretch yourself too much at one time…you may need to go a little bit at a time over a period of days, weeks. the latest news we have a sex swing that’s added a whole new element of fun and adventure,and talk about a work out.

Remember to beware of unsafe plastics in sex toys! Go for quality products by reputable companies. Always uses condoms with toys and wash them before and after use. read the instructions on care and sanitation. Store according to directions, I’ve had stuff ‘melt’ in a box due to temperature and humidity (welcome to Florida)
*Playing with toys can create an opportunity to build on established trust, communication skills and connection. *

The major take away from all of this sexual Adventure in playing with toys is that *you have to have a sense of trust with your partner and open communication without judgement in order to explore.* See toys as an addition and enhancement to your play….most of all HAVE FUN!!!! 

img 3267 Sex toys for all, enhancing your pleasure!

Fun with kink and toys

#SexToys