Women’s sexuality crash course part one

Author: taliaamour
April 3, 2017

here is the post you all have been waiting for!a crash course in women’s sexual challenges! I have divided it into two posts her is the first part

men and women have Many overlapping sexual concerns with low or no desire being the number one reported issue. In general you often find more information about women’s sexual challenges written about than men, usually because women are more likely to report sexual challenges to doctors and therapist. for women, inability to reach orgasm at all or with a partner sex is a close second challenge.

there is an interest in the pharmaceutical industry to try to find the new female Viagra- but there are really not as many options for women as there for men. women’s sexuality is very complex and often stems from memory and emotions…things that can not be addressed or measured with a pill. most of the time the messages our culture and society send women deeply affect their sexuality. they are never really given permission to enjoy and experience their sexual selves.

when you start to understand the cycle of energy involved in our sexual experience it all starts to make sense! one of the best analogies I’ve heard is from the book the multi orgasmic man- women’s sexuality is like boiling water: it take a little time to heat up and start to boil but once it does it takes a while to cool off! this means guys start slow! start soft! watch for her body’s response! ask what feels good! as a woman I’ve noticed what worked yesterday may not be the same today! l I think it has to do with hormones ) I tend to like different things at different times variety is key. what stays the same is the cycle. take time to build desire create the sexual tension. let her warm up before you dive in so to speak. women are stimulated verbally tell us what you think is sexy about us, tell us what turns you on, ask us what turns on! the imagination is the most powerful tool for arousal and the skin is the largest organ in the body. learn different types of touch, learn to feel our skin not just grab and jab us.

low or no desire: number one concern among women today.

-social conditioning is a major issue- messages include but not limited to: good girls don’t like sex, stay a virgin until marriage, sex is shameful and bad…the mother or whore message: that you can’t be both; men want a virginal wife but are obsessed with sex so sometimes men have issues experiencing their most erotic fantasies with their partner. these mixed messages can lead to shutting down of a womans sexual desire, not exploring their sexual desire at all, feeling shame and guilt for even acknowledging it.

other causes can be

-aging: perimenopause (the period before menopause one year or years before the last menstrual period) can greatly affect a woman’s sex drive. decline in estrogen can create hot flashes, mood swings, night sweats,weight gain,bloating, painful sex and being ignored by men make them feel less desirable. hormone replacement therapy may be an option to help alleviate symptoms. anti-depressants and other medications may add to challenges in addition to hysterectomy and other medical issues. always check out medications and hormones when addressing low sex drive they are often the culprit!

-relationship conflicts and power struggle issues: unresolved issues/long term unresolved conflicts in the relationship, some that may have nothing to do with sex even, may be affecting the libido as well. moving past an affair can also be an unresolved emotional issue.

women’s sexual desire is linked to the emotional and verbal part of the brain so make sure to resolve whatever issues and challenges you can by new learning communication skills. go The a councillor or therapist if you can’t seem to move beyond a past issue. you may also want to agree to set the issues aside and just connect with each other in a sacred space or by pure erotic desire. this takes communication and a conscious effort from both people. some issue take time and there is no reason you can’t come together intimately in the between time- as long as you’re both committed to resolving the issue.

women may also use sex as a way of gaining power or control in a situation they feel powerless in. they may be denying themselves pleasure and/or their partner pleasure because they feel powerless in another aspect of the relationship. again communication skills!! learn to authentically listen to each other.

-body image issues: feeling ashamed of their body or part of body, they may no longer feel sexy and shut down their sexual and or social self. they feel no self pleasure. encourage autonomy- the two of you separately were attracted to each other to come together as one- you both need time to cultivate a sense of self so you can again come together- maintaining a sense of self separate from your partner or child creates eroticism! don’t just become so and so’s husband/wife/mother/father- you are still a person apart from these roles we play.

masturbation is a great way to start to ‘prime the pump’- women may need permission to experience their sexual self. it’s important for her to acknowledge what is great and sexy about herself, give her permission to awaken her capacity to experience orgasmic energy again. tell her she is sexy! tell her what you love about her- not just physical attributes too. tell her and show her every day.

encourage self pleasure- it is a great way to start feeling orgasmic- masturbation is the foundation for partner sex!

-fatigue,low energy: is often an a major issue that affects sex drive! working mothers, high achievers,type a personality and even codependency can drain energy. when women are so busy caring for others, they Often have little time to care for themselves.

taking the time to relax in a way they define is important…you must serve from your saucer not your cup!

finding a ritual or routine to decompress like dance, exercise, take a bath, light candles, is a essential oils, massage are helpful in creating a transition from stress to sex! focus on building self esteem and self worth: you are responsible for your own orgasm, and so is she responsible for hers…she has to find what works for her. give her time to herself if needed, send her to the spa or out with her girlfriends to have some time away from household responsibility.

she needs time and space to be autonomous just like you.

-trauma,abuse , coercive relationship: before a woman can give herself permission to enjoy sex she must first heal old wounds. often times a therapist is best for working through past trauma and abuse. focus on surviving and thriving. women often shut down as a result of a bad experience. healing bodywork is a special modality that can be helpful. you may need to have sex in a certain way she is comfortable with touch her the way she wants to be touched.

This is a lot to take in! Stay connected for part two it’s a big one! Guys get ready for some more solid advice! 

#itstaliatime #escort advice

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